Birthday: July 20, 1958
Age: 50
Birth Name: William D. Mays

Original Date of HS of the Day: September 3, 2008
Claim to Fame: Billy started selling shit right out of high school. He used to sell portable washing machines on the Atlantic City boardwalk. He quickly moved up the ranks and eventually became the main saleswhore for Orange Glo and Oxi Clean.

Where is he now? Probably tightening the rope on his nutsack. That’s how he keeps his voice so constipated sounding.

Why is he HS of the Week? Billy is like a part of my family. I see him almost once a day. He screams at me like the angry uncle I never had.

Below is his infomercial for Mighty Putty. I am thisclose to buying this stupid shit. It might keep my asshole in check. I fucking love how Billy tells us it holds up to 350lbs but can pull an 80,000 lb tractor trailer. WTF?! Oh Billy! You don’t make sense in the brains, but I believe you.